How to Love Your Spouse: Words of Affirmation

How to Love Your Spouse: Words of Affirmation

It’s time for the third installment of my Love Language series. If you’re new to the series, let me fill you in. I chose the word LEARN as my word of the year for 2015 and learning about my husband is a big part of that. So a few days into 2015, Pearson and I decided to retake the Love Languages Quiz and we found out that both of our primary love languages changed. That just confirmed the fact that There is always something more to learn about your spouse because he or she is always changing!

The fact that Pearson’s primary love language was different also told me that I need to learn to love him through all the languages. Thus, I gave you ideas to love your spouse through Physical Touch and Quality Time the last two weeks. And today I five you ideas to love your spouse through words of affirmation.

  1. Write a list of things you like about your spouse. Then make a point to say them out loud to him out of the blue with no prompting. Some on my list include how brilliant he is, how appreciative he is, how much he loves and cares for me, and how attractive I find him.
  2. Tell him you’re glad you married him. Remind him often.
  3. Put yourself in his shoes and be kind. Maybe you’re having an argument and you know you’re right, but just take a minute to try to look at the situation from his perspective.
  4. Tell him you’re proud of him.
  5. Encourage him where he’s insecure. Learn what he’s insecure about and encourage him to do those things and tell him he’s doing great and you appreciate his efforts!
  6. Tell you appreciate him. 
  7. Tell him thank you for everything he does. Or maybe don’t even have a specific reason. Just “thank you for being you.”
  8. Tell him you love it when he does… You could make a list of these too.
  9. When he dresses up to go out or to head to church, tell him how nice he looks.
  10. Be humble. If you want him to do something ask as an equal, don’t demand like his mother.
  11. Complement him in public.
  12. Talk him up to your friends. Don’t ever talk negative about him behind his back. I always try to leave the negative stuff to just between us.
  13. Write him a love letter. Maybe even mail it to his office or to your own apartment.
  14. Leave cute, affirming sticky notes where he can find them. Brooklyn has a great list of things to write!
  15. Tell him you’re his biggest fan and mean it. Root for him in whatever he’s doing. Don’t ever be against him in life. If he wants to do something, support it. If it’s not something you think he should pursue, kindly express your concerns but then support his decision.
Well that about does it. This love language has always been the hardest for me to communicate with but I’m learning!
What would you add to my list?
Thanks for reading and be sure to come back next week for ideas to love your spouse through Gifts!
I'm a millennial wife and fur-mom living in Oregon. I'm passionate about marriages and making them last. I believe it's possible to build a marriage that will endure whatever comes your way and all it takes is a little work. And trust me, your marriage is so worth that effort!

2 thoughts on “How to Love Your Spouse: Words of Affirmation

  1. I hate to be blunt, but when you love a man, lists are not needed. “Know what I mean Vern? ” 🙂 And from a my cold dead heart, I hope you dance the funky chicken at your 50th wedding anniversary. You don’t see that anymore.

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